Bio: Dan VanNote

I get right to the point. Direct, messy, even pretty fucking gross (but always with a splash of humor), I invite the audience into the nitty gritty details of life we’d rather avoid, at once forcing us to confront our demons, and paving a path towards letting them go - or at least making them seem not-so-significant. My work primarily consists of short films. I am an avid lover of 48-hour film contests, and after participating usually ends up with a short film, some shiny new awards, and a respiratory illness. My mom would tell you that I’ve had vision ever since he was a 5-year-old and would lead teams of other kids around the room during yoga class (I was asked politely to leave those classes)

My art is driven primarily by one thing: my struggle to accept myself as a gay man. In an age where pride is at every shop window (at least in the big cities), I’ve found it to be a grueling and lonely journey. Even admitting to friends that I am still carrying a deep judgment - and even hatred - of myself took years to admit out loud, after I came out of the closet. I found there was always another layer of shame, whether it was “I should be proud of myself,” or the more fundamental “I should be attracted to women.” In my search for freedom from this conditioning, I eventually found plant medicines, and even ayahuasca. What I now understand as more than merely a psychedelic compound, Ayahuasca paved the way for me to rediscover my untamable essence, something I call my “Indomitable Prankster Spirit.” They also showed me the unity of all beings, that truly we are all one, and even though we all have these separate bodies and minds to play with, there is a source from which we spring, that permeates all beings with absolute love, belonging and joy. The contrasting simultaneity of oneness and unique expression that is difficult to comprehend. And I found that the way to access that beautiful field of belonging was - you guessed it - by accepting every little inch of myself. 

And it takes a lot of vomiting and looking people in the eye and saying, “I am so unbelievably GAY!” My art is an opening, a way to get comfortable with the shit and piss and vomit because, unfortunately, whether metaphorically OR literally, they are often the way - back to that absolute knowingness, unity, peace. The absurdity that all these things really are spiritual, everything is spiritual and can lead where we want to go anyways, is a potent medicine. 

Similarly, I want people to play in the absurd, which children naturally do every single day. The ridiculous, pointless, pure silliness is one of the greatest ways to take this thing called ego and put a wrench in its designs. The mind, in its attempts to save us from pain, will even tell us to kill ourselves. How absurd is that? It takes a fearless and gentle honesty to confront a mind that has lived in self-hate, and move outside of it, so that we laugh at its messages rather than fight or flee. Whether your mind is just a little irritating, or completely oppressive, it’s the same journey. And it takes the same courage. 

I hope my writing can give you that courage, which is already within you.